Friday, March 6, 2009

Bullies

Oh, let's see....where do I start? Generally Justin seems to be very popular among his classmates. They argue over who will sit next to him at lunch and who will hold his hand on the stairs. The kids in his class are all very sweet to him. Last Thursday, I was there for their fundraiser Fun Run. The kids were all running laps and the teachers are all at the start/finish line marking their t-shirts at each lap. So just past the start/finish all the teachers backs are turned and I see a kid from another kindergarten class run up behind J, grab the back of his shirt, jerk him to the ground, and then take off running. I was in shock. And torn between checking on my child and chasing the other one down. Of course I had to go check on J, and he just dusted himself off, smiled, and went on. By then I lost track of the other kid (they were all wearing the same shirt, and I only saw the back of his head). I didn't say anything about it at the time because I couldn't identify who did it, and Justin wasn't upset.
So this week I got this note from his teacher "Last Thursday, at free play, we had a little incident. Justin went down the slide and there was a child at the bottom of the slide- Justin kicked the child to get him to move. The boy preceded to try and hit Justin back. Of course Justin did not know any better so he started swinging at the child and anyone around him. I calmed both of the children down and talked to the little boy who tried to hit Justin back. I let him know that it was not okay for Justin to hit him, but sometimes Justin just acts. I also told him that he should NEVER hit a child back if they kick or hit him. The child was told to come tell an adult if Justin put his hands or feet on him again. I found out today that the very same incident happened at P.E. yesterday. One of the aides told me that it was with the same child. She told me that she did not know who started the hitting, and I let her know that I talked with that child and he knew that if Justin put his hands on him to go tell and adult and not hit back."
Free play would have been in the afternoon after the fun run, but I wonder if J and this kid have had prior incidents that the teachers didn't notice or report. So anyway, I did go to school & tell the teacher about what I saw at the fun run and she is going to talk to him and see if it might be related. I just can't imagine why a kid in another class would choose to target J as it seemed he did during the fun run.


And on the other end, Justin can also be a bully. We had a younger boy (also with FX) over to play one afternoon this week and J did NOT want him playing with his toys, and kept taking things away from him and shoving him. He only does this when he feels like something is 'his', not at school, but it's definitely something we have to work on so we can have friends over to play.