Haven't posted in quite a while. I've been meaning to, but it's hard to make myself do it at times. I went through a valley a few weeks ago worse than the initial diagnosis. I guess we had a few particularly bad meltdowns, and the realization that he's only 5, and the fear that it could get a LOT worse. I dunno, but I spent the better part of a week feeling that I could burst into tears at any moment and did a few times. That is very much not like me...I cry over sappy movies, yes, but real life very rarely. I finally told my Sunday School class, asked for prayer, and began feeling better the next day. So anyway....I'm finding myself praying more, and feeling more optimistic.

Every time I go to school either a teacher, an aide, the nurse...somebody, always stops me to tell me how much they love Justin. "He just smiles all the time", "he's the happiest kid I know", "he just lights up my day", etc... one even told me "everyone should have a child like him". I am thankful beyond measure for this - he obviously saves his worst behavior for me. I suppose that is a good thing, but it also wears on me emotionally that they get so much of the loving, happy Justin, and I get that mixed with outbursts of angry, violent, wild Justin. If only I could keep him the loving, happy, smiley boy all the time......

Facebook has taken over my life

Well, I wasn't very good at blogging before, but now I'm never here at all! Facebook has taken control of my computer...

Anyway, what's new...well, Justin is just gradually getting more and more aggressive and I had a bit of an emotional breakdown about it a few days ago. I'm better at the moment and working on a plan to try to get that under control. We are journaling everything, trying to identify triggers, searching for a behavioral therapist, and trying to get another appt with the neuro to discuss meds. We appreciate all of your prayers.

Most of Birmingham is abuzz with the possibility of snow next Monday/Tuesday. Lindsey is now nine and she has seen snow twice in her life and both were maybe half an inch. So snow is a big deal - I hate it, though. Anyway, I have to go buy carrots today just in case we need a snowman nose. :)

And it sneaks up on me again!

Every year Lindsey's birthday does this to me. I always say I'm going to plan ahead, but then Christmas gets chaotic, and then we are just trying to recover from the chaos and get through New year's, and then it's time to take down the decorations, and suddenly Lindsey's birthday party is this Saturday and I've not sent out one single invitation.
I tried to get her to have it at one of the pottery painting places, so I don't have to deal with the mess and clean up, etc, but she wants to have it at home again. She just wants a very few friends and family, thankfully.
So anyway...I guess I've got to get invites mailed out today. I so wish her birthday was maybe a week or 2 later so it wouldn't do this to me every year. But given how miserably large I was, and the fact that she was over 10 pounds, I don't think I could have survived being pregnant much longer anyway.
I think I had more to type, but suddenly J is here 'helping' me, telling me to 'push the green button'....

A Visit with Santa 2008

So Friday was the last day of school for the munchkins. Christmas for the teachers was more of a challenge this year as J now has his regular ed teacher, a special ed teacher, speech therapist, OT, 6 different aides, and the nurse. I wish I had seen Betsy's Pretzels a few weeks ago - they would be an awesome teacher gift. I made Chex Muddy Buddies(AKA puppy chow) and gave them all $5 Starbucks cards.
Thursday we went to their class parties and then checked them out an hour early and took them to the mall to see Santa. Yay, I'm so glad we went when we did! There was only one family in front of us in line! Justin has refused to have any part in sitting with Santa ever since the Screaming Fit of 2004. Yeah, it's awful, but it will probably always be my favorite Christmas picture ever, because it's the one that makes me laugh every time.







But this year he joyfully walked up, said "Hi Santa" hopped up on his lap and in the very first snap, we got this amazing picture. What a difference a few years make!
He didn't stay long, but he handled it well and we were proud of him. They gave us coupons for a free cookie for each of them, so that part was great too. He wasn't happy on the way out because he kept seeing toys and he didn't like the idea that he was leaving without getting anything other than a cookie. Yeah, patience is not his strong suit.

Ollie is back this year, and our elf brought a note from Santa this morning. Apparently Ollie has seen the meltdowns and the disobedience, but he has also seen some very kind and loving behavior too. Maybe the reminder will keep them in check for a few more days. One can only hope, right? I'd hate for Santa to bring them nothing but coal, but I have a feeling Santa will be kind to them this year.

I need to get busy wrapping stuff today as I've only wrapped one present so far. Oh and I've not yet sent out one Christmas card. Yeah, queen of procrastination, here, I know.

Thankfulness...

Things I'm thankful for, some more serious than others, and not necessarily in order...

• My Lord and Saviour, Jesus Christ
• My family, immediate, extended, even my in-laws are awesome. I could go on for days just on this one, but I won't, because it would cause me to miss turkey dinner.
• That reminds me...yes I'm thankful for dinner, and the turkey who gave it's life for us. And dressing (Yummmm!), sweet potato casserole, rolls, dessert....yuuummmmeee!
• Friends....how would I survive without you?
• The internet, as it has allowed me to connect with many new and old friends.
• Kindergarten. J knew about half of his letters in August, and his IEP goal was to know them all by May. He knows them all, uppercase and lowercase, and can tell you the sound they make. And, I have a life of my own between the hours of 8 and 3 - it's awesome.
• Teachers who care - they make a world of difference.
• Hubby's job, which allows me to stay home.
• My DVR. How did we survive without it? We love it so much hubby and I each have our own. Actually I share mine with the kids, which means I watch a LOT of Dora and the Backyardigans.
• This country, the freedoms we enjoy here, and the many who sacrificed to make that possible.
• Take-out Chinese, because my kitchen is currently clean, and I'm not cooking tonight.
• The 11-0 season the Crimson Tide has had thus far, and the hope of beating Auburn for the first time in quite a while - Roll Tide Roll!
• My parents, for raising me right, & for telling me to marry hubby anyway, in spite of the fact that he's an Auburn fan AND a yankee.
• The current drop in gas prices - wow.
• Slice and bake cookie dough - that's good stuff.
• My church family, a fantastic pastor, and great teachers.
• The Hagerman's, Steve Warren, Dr Berry-Kravis, and the many other specialists, researchers, educators, & therapists who have made huge differences in our lives and who continue to work towards finding better treatments for our kids.
• All of the Fragile families who work together to help and support each other through this journey.

There's more I'm sure...but my crossing guard is ready to go out and direct the holiday traffic in our neighborhood, so I better go keep an eye on him. Happy Thanksgiving to all!

Penguin, James Penguin

I only have 1188 songs on my iPod....
My musical tastes are, well, odd at best. Hubby says it will be the sign of the apocolypse one day when I hit shuffle and we hear Amazing Grace, followed by Superfreak. Many years ago, when I had my albums alphabetized I used to laugh that it went from Amy Grant to ZZ Top.

Anyway, I found this on a couple of different blogs and decided to give it a try.
Thanks to Paula’s Place: http://paulafasciano.blogspot.com/ and Holly Daze http://hollyzzdavis.blogspot.com/ for this one. :)
1. Put your music on shuffle.
2. For each question, press the next button to get your answer.
3. YOU MUST WRITE THAT SONG NAME DOWN NO MATTER HOW SILLY IT SOUNDS!
4. Tag ** friends who might enjoy doing the meme as well as the person you got the meme from.

IF SOMEONE SAYS "IS THIS OKAY" YOU SAY?
You Might Think - The Cars

WHAT WOULD BEST DESCRIBE YOUR PERSONALITY?
I'll be Home For Christmas - Brad Paisley

WHAT DO YOU LIKE IN A GUY/GIRL?
Rumor Has It - Clay Walker

HOW DO YOU FEEL TODAY?
Summer Highland Falls - Billy Joel

WHAT IS YOUR LIFE'S PURPOSE?
In a Little While - Amy Grant

WHAT IS YOUR MOTTO?
Huckleberry _ Toby Keith

WHAT DO YOUR FRIENDS THINK OF YOU?
Must Be Doin' Somethin' Right - Billy Currington

WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT VERY OFTEN?
Sapphire Bullets of Love - They Might Be Giants

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR BEST FRIEND?
Good to Go to Mexico - Toby Keith

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THE PERSON YOU LIKE?
Yes! - Chad Brock

WHAT IS YOUR LIFE STORY?
She's Got a Way - Billy Joel

WHAT DO YOU WANT TO BE WHEN YOU GROW UP?
Online - Brad Paisley

WHAT DO YOU THINK WHEN YOU SEE THE PERSON YOU LIKE?
Redneck Woman - Gretchen Wilson

WHAT DO YOUR PARENTS THINK OF YOU?
It is Well With my Soul - Wayne Watson

WHAT WILL YOU DANCE TO AT YOUR WEDDING?
There is a God- Valleydale Celebration Choir and Orchestra

WHAT WILL THEY PLAY AT YOUR FUNERAL?
I Ran (So Far Away) - Flock of Seagulls

WHAT IS YOUR HOBBY/INTEREST?
What Child is This? Vince Guaraldi - Charlie Brown Christmas

WHAT IS YOUR BIGGEST SECRET?
More Than a Feeling - Boston

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR FRIENDS?
She's a Beauty - The Tubes

WHAT'S THE WORST THING THAT COULD HAPPEN?
Friends in Low Places - Garth Brooks

HOW WILL YOU DIE?
I Left Something Turned On at Home - Trace Adkins

WHAT IS THE ONE THING YOU REGRET?
The Ballad of Billy the Kid - Billy Joel

WHAT MAKES YOU LAUGH?
Jungle Love - The Time

WHAT MAKES YOU CRY?
How Great Thou Art - Elvis Presley

WILL YOU EVER GET MARRIED?
Can't Get Enough of Your Love, Baby - Barry White

WHAT SCARES YOU THE MOST?
Atomic Dog - George Clinton

DOES ANYONE LIKE YOU?
Homegrown Tomatoes - Guy Clark

IF YOU COULD GO BACK IN TIME, WHAT WOULD YOU CHANGE?
I Play Chicken With the Train - Cowboy Troy

WHAT HURTS RIGHT NOW?
Escape(The Pina Colada Song) - Rupert Holmes

WHAT WILL YOU POST THIS AS?
Penguin, James Penguin - Brad Paisley

All I want for Christmas...

...is my 2 front teeth!

Yep, the Tooth Fairy is on her way to our house yet again! We don't know what happened to the tooth, and he doesn't care. This is his 4th lost tooth and only one of them we found. But Tooth Fairy understands and gives him credit for it anyway. Anyway, he lost it just in time - I may have to go download the Chipmunks version of '2 front teeth', just because it will annoy hubby to no end.

Well the good news on the stomach virus is that it has lasted just under 24 hrs for each of us. Lindsey got sick last night, and we had to throw away a teddy bear and her favorite pillow "Pilly". Yes, her pillow has a name and apparently is a girl pillow as Pilly is always referrred to as a 'she'. Anyway, we agreed that a new Pilly (this will be Pilly #3) will top her wish list. Let's hope Santa can handle that. It's a light up pillow - with an LED color changing light inside. Anyway, we are all feeling much better now...and we are praying that our recent guests will all be fine.

I was going to start Christmas decorating Sunday, but felt too bad to do anything - so hopefully we'll get started tonight or tomorrow. I found a crossing guard ornament, and a flamingo ornament to commemorate their Halloween costumes this year - so that's new, plus I got an 'arch' ornament from St Louis, but those are my only new decorations so far this year.

I think I'll go finish taking down the last of my scarecrows and other 'fall' themed decorations so I can start dragging out the other stuff.